its been 10 months. 10 months since my world came crashing down...what happened you ask? the un-thinkable... my mom died...it still hurts... i can't believe its been that long!! wow i didn't think i could make it to 6 months but i did... wow. i was so scared and sad for the logest time.. i still want to cry about it, but it's usless... sometimes i cant cry when i want to... its hard because i cant bring it up with my dad because i dont want to hurt him....it is the absolute worst when you see your dad cry.... it makes me angry because i feel so helpless all of the time.... tell me....will this pain ever go away? it also makes me angry because noone knows how i feel or ever will... i was always so mad at my mom and now i feel regret.... it was 7 monts after she died that my dads GIRLFRIEND told me how she died... he didnt even tell me... and he has a girlfriend after only 7 months... guess if it helps him, he can do whatever....i just...idk... everyone at school asks how i can deal wit it and they would want to kill themselves....i have wanted to...if they only knew... i tel them its not so bad once you get used to it... one of the worst parts of this is that about two weeks before this happened, i had a dream that she died.... then she did...from almost the same exact way.... it was scary well thats all for now
4 comments on my life sucks....
Add a comment
To add comments without entering your email and image verification, you must be logged in. Login or Join Blogster
You are absolutely right I don't know how it feels and I never really thought about how lucky I am until I read this. I know you made this blog so you could help yourself by relieving your feelings but you just helped me and will help many more people to stay and be strong.
many thanx
~tennisgrrl~
yeah, it was just to help me deal... im glad it helped you...and maybe other people too.... if you think about it, people take advantage of their parents all of the time....its really sad. but my mom was a drunk for the longest time...it hurt but it hurts even more now because she's gone
Welcome to blogsterville eliseebeth. My heart goes out to you. I want to encourage you with hope to hold on to the life you have been given. There is nothing more powerful than a person who has been "through the mill" and still holds their head up high. There is a purpose for your life. I want to share with you another person's testimony on YouTube. Doug Batchelor has an amazing story of trial and hope. It blessed me, and I hope it will encourage you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PT2nRSvcuhY
Thanks for sharing
Hold your head high
Nick
thanks nick... i will go check it out